Understanding Tweens Who Get Homesick

How to Handle Homesickness When a Child Sleeps Over a Friend's House

Jul 31, 2009

Homesickness is a common feeling that children get when away from home. It even happens to tweens. Be encouraging, and he will get through it.

By the time a child reaches his tween years, he is more than likely over homesickness when it comes to sleeping over a friend's house. In fact, some children never even experience the feeling of being homesick. But, there are cases when a tween is still not ready to break away from the comfort of his own bed at night. Rest assured this is perfectly normal, but there are steps to take to help him overcome this homesickness syndrome.

Communicating Feelings of Homesickness

Talking about why a child feels homesick is the first step to helping him overcome his issues. Perhaps he has fears about how the other family lives, and what goes on at the house. Or, it could be that he is afraid of some catastrophic event that will prevent him from being able to come home again. And, it could be as simple as he likes the comfort of his own room. Be prepared to talk about what makes him feel homesick, and counteract his fears with encouraging words.

Set Up a Game Plan With the Other Family

Talk with the parents of the family whom the tween will be staying with. Be open about the tween's fear of staying away from home. It is better to have the other family prepared, in case it turns into a rough night. If the parents know to expect a case of homesickness, it will be easier to deal with.

Makes some suggestions that might make a tween feel safer at the friend's house. If the child usually sleeps with a night light, suggest that the family have one on at night. Little things could make all the difference in the world to making a tween feel better while away from home.

Handling Homesickness When it Occurs

When getting a call in the middle of the night to come get a child at a friend's house, it can seem aggravating, but try to understand the tween's position. Don't make him feel guilty about not being able to make it all the way through the night. Instead, encourage him that next time he may be able to do it, and that his parents are glad he made the effort. This is just one of the many sacrifices parents make for children, and they might as well turn it into a teachable moment, rather than a grudge match.

Time Will Heal the Feelings of Homesickness

Tweens eventually outgrow homesickness, but at different rates. In fact, chances are one parent probably had the same issues growing up as well. So, it's easy to see this is just a phase.

Homesickness is a scary feeling to the tween who is feeling it. Be reassuring to the child, and encourage him to keep trying. Don't dwell on the homesickness, but move on to how much fun sleeping over a friend's house can be. There is a day coming when being homesick is a thing of the past.

The copyright of the article Understanding Tweens Who Get Homesick in Tween Communication is owned by Denise Oliveri. Permission to republish Understanding Tweens Who Get Homesick in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.